What Are Our Kids Learning?

     While recently watching such Disney classics as "Toy Story 2" and "Cinderella", I began to wonder: what, exactly, are the young impressionable children of the next generation learning from such films? Well, here's a list:

Top Ten Things Disney Movies Teach Kids

1. Hiding inside a traffic cone is a perfectly safe way to cross a street
2. Ogres are like onions
3. Never trust your stepmother
4. Animals can talk (but that's not necessarily a good thing)
5. Sing-- whether you want your prince to come or you have to take some disgusting medicine, singing always helps
6. Death by monkeys-- a terrifying, and all-too-real, possibility
7. Laughter is an anti-gravity agent
8. Talking to clocks, trees, and granite statues is completely normal
9. Kissing is both a romantic pass-time and a life saver!
10. Pixie dust-- cheaper than airlines since February 5th, 1953*

     Just in case you've been curious about those Disney movies and whether or not they're appropriate for your child, you now have a list that will hopefully help you decide which parts of Beauty and the Beast to censor.

Thanks for listening!

Maggs

*Did you get that cultural reference, America? If not, search for Peter Pan on Wikipedia.