A Bit of Nonsense

Whatever you do, don't expect this to make sense. I promise you it won't. No matter how hard you try, you will absolutely not be able to get anything out of this. After reading it, your mind will have turned to a blob of.... well, we don't know. That's just it. We don't know. I know least of all, which is why I am the one writing this nonsensical bit of wondering. If this were at all important, I would call in an expert on the matter. But seeing as this is about bepuzzledness, confuzzlement, and baffleossity, I have decided to become qualified. Therefore, I have just spent the past hour bumbling my brains with algebra in order to become unbalanced enough to write this. I hope you appreciate this, Marvin! Now who is Marvin, you may ask. You mean to say that you don't know? Dang. I was hoping someone could tell me. Wait just one minute, please.............. (insert rather tiresome hold music) aha! Marvin the second, that is to say, Marvin's son, has just informed me that he will be willing to tell me who Marvin is if I could bother to tell him who a certain puppy named Bill is. Well, I don't know a puppy named Bill, but I'm sure that someone out there in this universe does. And now that I think about it, who would name their puppy Bill? Not to say that Bill is a bad name for a puppy, exactly, but it is rather unusual. However, I am sure that there are some even more unusual names out there, even if they don't belong to puppies. Let me see....... some very strange names are as follows:

• Humperdink (boy)
• Jypsie (girl)
• Bharnee (girl)
• Zanella (girl)
• Wyl (boy)
• Zarson (boy)

Now, I do not wish to offend anyone who has decided to name their child any of the above names. Maybe your son Zarson is at the top of his class, or your daughter Jypsie is an expert ballerina headed for the Joffrey Ballet Company. I just simply wish to point out that these names seem a little strange to me because I have grown up knowing people with more common names such as Emma, Lucas, Katelynn, Daniel, or Stephanie. However, if you have been deeply offended, I suggest that you go talk to my friend Marvin (mentioned above). He will help you, if you can find him.

Thanks for listening (especially today when my mind has gone a little crazy)!

As always, the Disturbed and Unusual Maggs

P.S. My Great-Grandfather Albert actually had a dog named John who would catch a live bluegill if you tossed it to him and eat it whole. I have a very strange family, did you know?